A Pleasurable Deal

This play is well-worn and tattered. It has clearly been read many, many times.

This play is well-worn and tattered. It has clearly been read many, many times.

Properties

• Books
• Rarity: Common
• Price: 14 gp

Text

[This is an excerpt from the play 'A Pleasurable Deal', banned in no fewer than four cities for its lewd content. Its scandalous nature led to a number of widely-distributed and illicit printings.]

Narrator:

Come hear fair folk a tale now lost to time.

In grief, this man well-sunk to depths sublime

A gift he sought to win his lady's heart.

Our cambion smiled, for now the game did start.

[Enter Robert. Male tiefling. Crying. Carlisle, stage right. Flash of smoke.]

Carlisle:

Weep not, young man, though free your wife has fled,

And comfort found in comrade's arms and bed.

She licks her lips and cries his name, oh my!

And now you seek to be the apple of her eye?

Robert:

How does a stranger know such things, I ask?

Carlisle:

I watch you from the shadows and I see

Your shame and grief for nature's malady.

You seek to win your lady and her bed

To have your name upon her lips instead

Robert:

You know my curse, my pain, my grief, my woe?

Carlisle:

Of you, I know, you seek a large hoe,

To plow fair maid, and sow a seed to grow,

But lack do ye a mighty horn and mast

With which to guide a maid to bed and fast.